He sized up the two shoes carefully, making sure that both were their exact equals in height and length. They both appeared to be of a type of black reserved only for the darkest of hearts, but perhaps the minimal lighting in the room was the main contributor to this bit of belief. In fact, it could have been both a combination of the lack of light and the steady rising temperature that the room seemed to be taking on that made this observation seem even more factual in nature. Whatever the cause of his current belief, the shoes were indeed at the very least, of a dark nature. Not so dark as to be the kind reserved for witches, goblins, or some other practitioner of the forbidden arts, but rather the kind of dark reserved for the twilight hour or, at the very most, the darkness that comes from a gathering depression felt during the height of a winter’s coldest night in February. He went to raise the shoe, likely the left, as was his usual inclination, but stopped, debating whether there was some sort of karmic realignment that could occur should he choose to first put on the right shoe. The last few days would indeed, while not the most difficult or disconcerting, had been most improved with a few extra moments of happiness added to the usual mix of general malaise that seemed to define his current days. But his desire to maintain the current order of things, coupled with the now dilemma of being a few minutes over the time he would have normally walked out the door, forced him into admitting that at least for today, the left shoe would have to be the one put on first.
He proceeded to grab the left shoe, making care to not awkwardly seize it in a way that would cause pain, discomfort, or worse an overall tearing of the posterior muscle in the wrist of his left hand. Having always been his dominant hand, any sort of paralysis of the left would no doubt be devastating, both in terms of the overall physical pain he would likely suffer, as well as the psychological pain of having lost, if only temporarily, a sense of his identity. Something so trivial as being left or right handed might not seem like the immediate basis to establish an entire identity around, considering that identity is confirmed before the person has any real control, but the admittedly small rarity of the condition makes the idea of possessing some sort of uniqueness attractive and thus desirable to base your personage on. The lift, though, from the floor to a height not quite at the knee was a journey that passed by with no unusual vigor or trauma.
A quick check of the clock, by which all of human kind watches with a both a keenness and a no doubt nagging feeling that the passage of time signified by this invention is by its very nature bringing the future fate of our eventual leaving of the mortal coil ever closer, confirmed that the time to finish these few remaining tasks before venturing outside the safety of the household to a place wherein the comforts provided by a household could be earned and purchased, was now approaching a critical hour. He simply HAD to complete the slipping on of both shoes, as the business world, and indeed most of the professional and public world, preferred that the socks and toes of a human being be kept company by an encasing that would mold or bend to the foot. Of course, when one was able to venture to the more private and personal world, the debate over whether the encasing was necessary would be a lively one with no doubt many people offering and determining their own paths towards the answer that worked for them.
So, sitting down on the bed, he was able to do a quick visual check of the overall condition of the shoe, making sure that there were no obvious tears or other signs of wear that would cause the stranger or familiar to be able to form a snap judgment of the life he must lead or have. It at first seemed like there had been perhaps gremlins or fate determined to play a practical joke on him, as there was on initial examination what appeared to be a slow cracking of the leather that caused a relatively small imperfection in the shoe that would simply not do if he was to be an impressing site to the public he would be dealing with today. Thankfully for him, or perhaps unfortunate in that it could suggest an examination of the pupils may soon be in order, what seemed imperfection was just a passing shadow easily remedied by moving his head back about 2-3 inches. So the final passage of the shoe from knee to foot should be able to proceed as usual. Of course, as he got ready to lift the shoe, you never knew if a passing wind caused from the open window on a rather sunny day would impact the tract of the journey and cause it to go off kilter at a moment that would, of course, be more embarrassing than irreparable. So the passage from one body part to the other would proceed with the utmost of caution. The lifting of the shoe was easy enough as the shoe was of the lightest of weight and thus not taxing enough to cause the person doing the lifting to run out of breath or have to take a moment to soothe a sore muscle made ever more sore by being used beyond its natural ability. Then came the obvious need to marry the shoe to the foot by bringing it downward, a process not unlike describing the unfortunate spiral of a person addicted to some kind of narcotic or other substance that would cause the overall condition of a rapid trend downward. The descent began to occur and was fortunate in being able to be practiced during a time in which any potential waywardness by outside forces was at a minimum. Eventually the air being occupied by the dress shoe above was abandoned, and the air currently housed very near the site of the foot was taken over by the shoe. It would then slowly be worked over the left foot, meeting some initial resistance, as the shoe had not been worn in a few days and thus had probably lost a bit of its elasticity from non-usage. But this resistance was overtaken by the force of the shoe being pushed onto the foot and thus, after a few moments, the left foot was entirely ensconced within the cozy confines of the left, black dress shoe.
Now for the right.